Sunday, November 16, 2008

College-Chapter 3

Fall. Sleet of rain on my face. Wet. Walking slowly. Breathing deeply. Thinking back. Musing.

*************

Dinner with Tong Tong, my friend. I met him halfway through my dinner but as he says, "This is America." Friendships are formed in the space of seconds, with the shake of a hand, an acknowledgement of a smile. Names? They are not necesssary. It is recognition that counts.
Table-talk:
"I'm going to have a 3.5 GPA this semester because of my room-mate."
"Why?"
"I never get any sleep! He is always up and down on his bed at 3 a.m every night...I tell him to shut up but--"
"Huh?"
"He brings a different girl with him every night."
"Ah..."

**************

Bathroom break. Closet space. Tiled walls and floors. Tissues and hand-soap.
Loud, heart-wrenching sobs from one of the stalls. Two thoughts: did she just pee on a stick and have it turn pink or did her boyfriend give her an STD for Christmas?
It's on the tip of my tongue to ask, "Are you alright?"
I hesitate. Want to go her. Want to help.
But can already hear her yelling, "This ain't none of your business, bitch!"
I get out.

***************

"I gotta stay off the fucking crack for a couple of weeks, so I can take a blood test for me moms."
"Man, that blows! I'm sorry, man." [Hefty, consoling slap on the back]

****************

Guy with a goofy grin and a rose behind his back. Walking with single-minded purpose.
Reaction: awwww!
Meets his boyfriend. Gives him a kiss.

****************

College.

Fall. Sleet. Wet. Walking. Slowly.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Not quite arbitrary--

"Each man must anchor himself to some final truth."

In a world where competition, strife, and argument, are the fault of individual belief and opinion, how are we to decipher truth? Is it to the man with the louder voice that we must submit, to the greater will that we must bend? If truth is relative, each man is right. But how is the world to be ordered and chaos averted--if everything is true and therefore by extension, nothing false?

It would seem then that we all require absolutes-- though some will argue the right to non-absolutes. I confess that I am at pains to reconcile the two thoughts: which takes precedence over the other? Or perhaps the answer is that the two are separate and have no common ground? But is not that answer an absolute in itself? It is obvious that I confuse myself.

I ask then: "Are there universal truths? If so, who decides them?"

To the individual:

What are your truths?

What are your absolutes?

*********************************

Absolute [Philosophy]
a) Something regarded as the ultimate basis of all thought and being. Used with the.
b) Something regarded as independent of and unrelated to anything else.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Plea

Rarely, rarely comest thou,
Spirit of Delight!
Wherefore hast thou left me now
Many a day and night?
Many a weary night and day
'Tis since thou art fled away.

How shall ever one like me
Win thee back again?
With the joyous and the free
Thou wilt scoff at pain.
Spirit false! thou hast forgot
All but those who need thee not.

Extracts from Percy Byssche Shelley's Song

Monday, November 10, 2008

Collage? [2]

They fought over the side of the bed closest to the wall. They fought over who would take the blanket and who would take the sheet. They laughed. And again she deluded herself that that was all it was going to be. He would take the left-side of the bed and she would take the right.They would talk until the sun came up. Silly nerves! What was there to fear?

He wore only skimpy little shorts as he climbed into the bed. She wore her jeans, and a little camisole, and said to herself, "At least I am fully covered," as she huddled in the corner of the bed furthest from him.

The silence that settled was awkward-- she didn't quite know what to say, and so she said nothing. She supposed that they would talk in the morning. She had began to let her body relax, when she felt a warm hand grasp hers. She jumped a little and then giggled nervously.
"I'm cold," he said.
"You can have the blanket then," was her prompt response, "Give me the bed-sheet."
A pause.
"I'm really cold."
Could he be suggesting?? No, no. This was Emma. Sweet, innocent Emma.
"You can have the bed-sheet too then," she offered generously.
"But I don't want you to be cold either..."
Why did his voice sound so heavy all of a sudden?
"We could keep each other warm...You know that verse in the Bible-- when two lie together as one?" He spoke slowly, and began to run his fingers up and down her arm. Up and down.
And then the alarm bells finally went off in her mind.

********************

"Pushy, like all over me, like horny breath. Like licking me. Like pinning me to the bloody bed (with one hand!) and I was kicking and fighting. I've never felt so vulnerable and stupid in my entire fucking life!"
She spoke haltingly, and couldn't quite meet her best friend's eyes. The gestures were frantic, and she grimaced with every pause.
"What happened then?" her friend asked, with not a little concern.

*********************

She did not know how it happened. But suddenly, he was on top of her.
Her eyes opened wide.
What! What was that poking at her thigh??
He leaned close to her face and with one arm, casually pinned her to the bed. He was smiling.
"You know you want this," he drawled, "I want to have fun with you."
She struggled to speak. She was choked, she couldn't breathe. And he was panting over her. He trailed his sticky tongue over her cheek, over her lips. She writhed beneath him, kicked out. Tried to wrench her head away from him, and had to endure the agony of saliva in her ear. His legs on hers felt like lead, she couldn't move. She tried to move him with her arms, but that was futile too.She would have screamed, but he would have forced his tongue into her mouth if she did.She kept her lips pressed tightly shut. And kicked harder.

He eased back a little to look at her.
"What's wrong?" His puzzlement was genuine.
She found her voice."Emma, you need to get off me and move over to your side of the bed." The tone she used was placating.
"Why?" he whined, "I wanted tonight to be special. I wanted you to remember me. And you want this too. I know you do!"
"Emma, please get off." It was a strain to sound reasonable.
He slid off reluctantly.
"At least let me kiss you."
She could feel the bile rise up her throat.
"No." It was a simple and flat statement.
The silence grew thick again.
"I can't believe I trusted you, Emma."
The last words seemed to flip a switch in his mind. He moved quietly to his corner of the bed, and was still.

********************

"What happened?" Her friend repeated anxiously, not privy to the memory the 'heroine' was reliving.
"I got fucked, my friend, "she replied, "I lost my virgin mind."

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Collage? [1]

[For DK, who has tired of the 'succinct'... :P]

That an unlikely story should begin with a car radio blinking the improbable time-5:90, over and over seems somehow apt.

Her stumbling from the taxi, bruising her knee, ripping her jeans, and breaking a toe-nail would follow as minor catastrophes. Not enough to elicit more than the quirking of an eyebrow.

No wonder that when she swore at the taxi-conductor, with that manner of inevitability, she displayed none of her usual vigour. It was almost pleasant.

She was going to meet a him. Of course. Any good story must posture at some point-a male and female, to hold the majority's interest.
We shall sidestep the norm, and endow our heroine not with elegance or style, slender form or ethereal grace but healthy curves, earthy tongue and a singular disregard for society's expectations. Ah, but to pay respect to custom, we shall deem her naive youth. She was young, and therefore must be naive. Must.

********************
The room was bare. With that sparse intensity of motel rooms. The décor consisted of a large bed in the centre, with a plastic chair by the side of it, almost as an after-thought. The floors were red; the walls blue and in the second-floor windows, hung gauzy curtains of a gaudy gold. This seedy room could not pretend to be more than it was-- a scene for consummation. As if to confirm this thought, the room's occupant saw out of the corner of her eye, the torn wrappings of a Lifeguard condom pack, clinging to the chair's back.

Our heroine smiled. Emma was a sweet boy. Admittedly, he was sweet...on her, but he was harmless. They would only talk, as he had suggested. They were friends. They would spend the night together catching up on old times, and next week she would leave for 'outside countries.'
In a lodge? So what? She could hardly ask him to sleep over at her house-- what would her mother say? He had asked her to wait for him in the room, while he finished off some work for his older brother and created an alibi for himself. And so now, she sat on the kinky bed, with the doubtful towel and lesu draped on it, courtesy of the thoughtful 'hosts.'
She stared at the room's door, and the tooth-brush that served the purpose of door-knob/ door-lock. She smiled again. The Charmi Inn, Wandegeya.

**********************

Tired, over-worn Bata school shoes. They were the first things she noticed when Emma stumbled in to the room a couple of hours later. Darling school-boy. She had to stifle the laughter. He carried chips and chicken in buveera, two bottles of Rwenzori mineral water, a couple of toothbrushes and a small tube of Colgate. Prepared, wasn't he? This time she laughed outright. She could not tell, of course, what else he was carrying so eagerly in his back-pockets.

He offered her the food. She ate. He watched her eat, with unwavering concentration.
She shrugged off the puppy-eyed adoration. She was used to it.
Between bites, they talked.
She spoke of bringing home a mzungu, and he jerked like it was a physical slap.
"I will wait for you," he said.
She decided to ignore the sombre tone.

He got up abruptly, announced that he was going to take a shower.
He took his shirt off slowly, while continuing to speak to her, such that her eyes were drawn reluctantly to his chest and...
"It's late, we should go to bed after I take a shower," he said.
Her mind registered only his ridiculously sharp nipples.
He took his trousers off.
And then it occured to her, that maybe she ought to be nervous.

********************

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

If women ruled the world...

It would look like this:






























**Got this off of my email. Thought I'd share! :-)

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Presidential whatsit!

Obama? McCain?
*Yawn!

I will not be glued to the nearest screen, waiting with bated breath as the polls come in.
I shall use this public holiday appropriately- I shall sleep!
And when I hear screaming, I shall know who is ahead and *ahem who is not.

But then:
NBC News will be here covering 'college kids' reactions,' so perhaps I shall make myself available. I'll be the A-freak-an waving and screaming:

"Njagala kutumira abantu bange..."

Look out for me! :D

**Who do you think deserves to be President? [Popular vote aside. The electoral colleges decide in the end, you know. :-)]